Birthday its here again oh my gosh I’m finally 19

Yeah, as u all know I’m getting older. I’m nineteen, the last year of my teen life. I haave to really make new changes in me. For instance being more matured and do not depend on others so much like I used too. I also should be making decision using my head and not my heart. Well, I have to kill the girl that you recognize, every single one of you who know me from before. I’m not that charming little lady anymore (am I charming before? Okay its better left unanswered..hehe..) throughout my life, I have been experiencing a good share of happy birthdays, sad birthday but still every single birthdays I had none were clear to me until up to 3 years back. Well, I get a-get-many-present-birtday on my 16th birthday, an exciting mail-post-birthday on my 17th birthday, a well-celebrated-and-oh-too-many-birthday-treat on my 18th birthday, but none has really touches my heart like the celebration of my 19th birthday. Actually, it wasn’t a cool-superb-birthday or a romantic-sweet-birthday, it was a simple-kisses-on-cheek-and-lots-of-card-birthday. Celebrating my birthday at that house were simple yet leaving me feeling rather serene. on the eve of my birthday, accurately on maghrib time, all the kids were waiting for me at the surau, they closed my eyes and led me there. With my eyes closed they sang ALLAH SELAMATKAN KAK FARA for me. I was trying real hard to blink away the tears that had started pooling around my eyes. (what? I’m embarrassed okay, this kids have never seen me shed any tears, far worst bursting into endless snot cry, which would be real ugly..haha) and after that each one of them give me a kiss on cheek. Ookay, admit it that was real sweet, don’t ya think? I thought so too. My phones rung and it was kautsar asking me to send him to hospital since he had a back-ache. As a good sister I did send him to hospital that night. I received text messages from my parents wishing me birthdays, a phone call from my baby sister and she had undergone a series of spooky event because of that phone call, 3 text messages from my friends, and a series of birthday wishes in facebook. That’s it, well u cant say I have a well celebrated birthday but I’m happy. Anyway that night, I’ve found out at the hospital that I have some kind of renitis. Its an allergy, and drinking warm water would make the coughing worst cz it would encourage my lung to expel liquid which also was phlegm, I guess so. and it does came true, strike 12 that night I start coughing rather badly. Really2 cough and I cant sleep. It was disastorous. But when I thought ALLAH would be near the one who was sick, I felt weirdly comforted. And strange as it may seem I love it when I cough. And that’s when I get my first birthday present from aqila and birthday card from hasanah. Well most of the card I received were hand made and you could imagine how will the card looked like. Most of them were kids ranging from age 10 to 15. the cards were cute. Seriously. Downright honest and childish.Kak Wan said, the kids were start doing the cars the night before, right after I went to hospital. So sweet. But some were filled with advice that really affects me deeply. I’ll share with you some of the thought later at the end of this post. And oh, my ustazah’s wish was weird, “hajar, selamat pendek umur”. Luckily I know what it means, since I’ve read, Nota Hati Seorang Lelaki by Pahrol Mohd Juoi. Any way, that’s it about my birthday. I really do have a very happy-smappy birthday this year.

Buatmu mujahidah solehah - dgn kecantikanmu, kau lebih elok dari matahari; dgn akhlakmu, kau lebih wangi dari haruman; dgn rendah hati, kau lebih tinggi dari bulan; kau lebih halus dari rintik; maka pertahankanlah keindahan ini agar kau terus menjadi sayap kiri perjuangan islam,penegak kalam Allah di muka bumi.-kak wan